The Beginnings of a Home DIYer
Or somewhat failed beginnings
Hello all!
I apologize for the delayed post this week! Last weekend, I moved into my new apartment, so I have been busy getting my home ready. I worked on several projects, so there may be extra posts in the next few weeks, but enjoy my somewhat unhinged retelling of the whirlwind that was the last seven days.
Finding My Style
Stylist Allison Bornstein first introduced me to the “Three Word Method”, which helped me think more critically about my style. She focuses on clothing, but her methods could easily be expanded into other aspects of personal style. One thing Bornstein talks about is contrast and contradiction. One of the key elements of someone with an interesting style is to have something not quite fit. It gives the eye something to look at, something to be intrigued by. It elevates the style from something mundane to something personal and unique to you. She also coined the “Wrong Shoe Method”, which articulates this point well. Things do not have to match, and I have started leaning into this more and more.
Because I did not own furniture until this last week (Danh took all of it), I did not follow the method in the video above, but I found an interior designer Deco DNA who created a quiz that helps figure out what you are drawn to. She also breaks down interior design aesthetics into three words: color, style (general vibe), and design intensity (how much stuff is in the space). For me, I am Bold, Moderate, and Cohesive. This means that I enjoy deep contrasting colors, balancing form and function, and uniting diverse elements. She included that a matching interior design style for me is Dark Academia. I used this to start my mood board on Pinterest.
I learned I like to have moody pieces, but I also like bright white walls. I liked combining more modern pieces with a vintage chair. I liked mixing patterns, metals, textures, and woods. The more ideas I pinned, the clearer the vision for my apartment.
With my Pinterest board in mind, I looked for furniture every day for hours. I scoured Facebook Marketplace, OfferUp, and Craigslist in hopes of finding the perfect pieces. It was no easy feat. I limited myself to solid wood furniture, and I wanted something that truly matched my style. (I even went down a rabbit hole of trying to find the right fabric to reupholster what I thought would be the perfect couch.)
Thanks to my hours and hours of scavenging, I found a dining table, couch, headboard, and chair that fit what I was looking for. My mom and I also ended up driving to Naperville to the CB2/Crate and Barrel Outlet and found three beautiful dining chairs and an ottoman, which I think began to bring my living/dining room together nicely. I have included some preliminary images of my space below. Hopefully, as I approach my start date, it will begin to feel more homey and styled to my Pinterest boards.
Refinishing My Headboard
The more interesting part of my week, however, has been trying to make my bedroom feel more homey. My parents, Danh, and Alex were able to help me move the living room furniture, but dude, the living room furniture has been an ordeal. I am a “sweaters must be folded and in a drawer” person. I do not like when they get droopy and the shoulders move out of place. I do not like stretching them out unintentionally. I do not like breaking a million hangers. I am only partially unpacked because I am on a quest for the perfect dresser to match my headboard.
And aforementioned headboard has been the bane of my existence this week. It started so blissfully. Ten dollars (!) for a solid wood headboard that has a provencal, feminine curviness to it that I loved. I felt vintage and solid, and most importantly, I could refinish it.
I wanted to get rid of its hand-painted flowers and re-stain it to a warmer wood tone. So I began by hand-sanding it, moving from 80 to 120 to 220 grit. It was very standard. I felt like I had gotten most of the sheen from the sealant off, and I tried to stain it with wood oil. But then I realized, I had not gotten down to the actual wood. Any spot with even a hint of the previous stain remained unchanged by the new oil. When I hand-sanded, I had just removed the sealant, and for the wood oil I bought, I needed to get to the wood. This is where I cried the first time. I had sanded the wood for two and a half hours. If two and half hours of work removed the sealant, it would take me days to get to raw wood.
Alex came to my rescue! His work had an orbital sander they were willing to lend me, and I was able to sand the headboard down quickly, except for the trim. The headboard looked beautiful.
On the same day, I conditioned and stained the main flat piece and felt reasonably content! However, the stain looked a little splotchy even with the pre-stain conditioner, and I was disappointed the trim was so difficult to sand. I felt frustrated but with some encouragement from Margeaux and Alex, I figured it was at least worth trying to finish the project, especially because it will be covered by pillows anyway.
Yesterday, I walked myself back across the street and bought a different stain for the trim. For the main part, I used a wood oil finish stain, which soaks into the wood grain. I initially chose this because it keeps the grain visible and looks more natural. Because I could not adequately sand down to the trim’s wood grain, I opted for gel stain, which sits on top of the wood. I had used gel stain before and did not like the messy application process, but this was my best option, so I persevered through 45-degree weather and stained the trim.
This is where I started crying again. When staining, you want to wipe off the excess stain left on the surface of the wood so the stain can dry and cure. With the wood oil, I did not have much to wipe off, but with gel stain, I had to be more intentional about wiping the layers off. With my parents, I bought a pack of rags to clean my apartment, and I thought they were lint-free, given they are used on cars. Alas, I was wrong, and I got lint all over my newly stained trim. So I cried. I spent three days and $75 working on this, and I still could not get it right.
But then I ate some lunch, my mom said she liked it still, and I reminded myself, “Who is going to be looking at this anyway?” Well, Alex reminded me of that, that I can’t be perfect at something the first time, and that I learned a lot in the process.
When I looked at the headboard today, I felt proud of how much work I put in. I still have to figure out how to mount it, but I am glad I attempted to refinish it. It makes me more excited for the projects to come.
Therefore, my takeaways that I hope you learn from too:
Use a chemical stripper or an orbital sander
Orbital sanders will fly out of your e-bike’s basket
You will end up with leftover stain so prepare for more projects to make it worth your money
Not all wood is in good enough condition to stain, even with wood conditioner
Wood oil is good for pure, raw wood
When in doubt, use gel stain
Make sure your rags are actually lint-free or you will cry
Have the best friends and family to tell you everything is fine
Nothing has to be perfect (just pay for someone else to do it if it needs to be)
And the most important part of life is not about getting somewhere or something, it’s about learning as much as you can along the way. Thank you Alex for always reminding me of that.